Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
I really need to stop coming home drunk and lint rolling my rabbit.
You should've stopped drinking when you started asking people for bites of tequila.
you got us kicked out of the restaurant for trying to pee in the trash can.
Just keep my face away from hard objects. And by that I do not mean erect penised.... those are totally fine. It's more just things like rocks, table edges, blunt objects, etc so I don't get another concussion.
He said he was gonna go pull a lochte and the next thing we know he's outside ass naked peeing in the neighbors kiddie pool.
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
Just opened up the freezer to find chocolate penis popsicles. Too hungover for this shit
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
You passed out in your dogs bed and you only willingly woke up because I told there was a bottle of vodka and a snickers bar waiting for you upstairs
THEN YOU WILL NOT GET TO SEE MY TITS TONIGHT OR IN THE NEAR FUTURE YOU HEARTLESS BASTARD
he answered his phone during sex and left to go help that drama queen with her latest bullshit. I'm drinking all his vodka. it's asshole tax
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
Randomize
