I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
I literally might walk of shame home on a cable car. If that doesn't scream San Francisco I don't know what does
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
I'm in the Wal Mart stall where we found out you weren't pregnant. This is where I'm going to propose to you. I feel like that would be the most romantic
It's one of those mornings where you wake up and want to go to church for the first time in ten years. THAT shameful.
foreskin is a definite game changer
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
This is not a drill. I need a cape. And a tuxedo. Simultaneously. Repeat. NOT. A. DRILL....
Also, feel like I need to install a nanny cam to remind myself what I did the night before.
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
Randomize
