i fucked some guy last night. i called him nick jonas by mistake. i'm 24.
There was this creepy guy on the bus. So I puffed out my stomach & began so hold my stomach like I was preggers.
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
My piss changed color midstream. Think that means I have a 50/50 chance of passing the test?
I was going through my paperwork and I found the lifetime warranty card for my 14" dildo. I saved it. You know, just in case.
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
I think a kid would responsible me up
He leaned off the deck, puked a waterfall of beer, looked back at everyone and said "it was just a burp".
Then years and years after that I will send you a picture of my warped vagina from all the kids that I had.
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
I keep track of what day of the week it is by my recent destinations on my nav system. \nRight now it's: booty call, bar, booty call, brunch, bar, church so that must mean we are getting close to Sunday when we start the rotation all over again.
Your mom has reinvented the use of a ping pong ball.
Randomize
