this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
you were exchanging tortilla chips with the guy at the next table, telling him your table was given the "big chips" because it was your 21st birthday
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
trying to figure out why the only thing in our freezer is an expired loaf of bread, a white t shirt, and a receipt from taco bell for 37.50 from last Friday
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
Just realized i left my bra at his house. WHY do i suck at one night stands?!
The number of tpain songs that actually relate to my life right now is embarrassing.
It's statistically impossible for there not to be at least one guy sexting you right now
Will you still call me Bond when I'm sober?
Randomize
