Last night I ate the rest of the salsa with my hands. And i DONT have a hangover? Glorious.
Pants on the Ground is the theme song of my life
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
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We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
Well the weddings in 4 days so I already got the eightball lined up and the wii fit all warmed up. Still wanna bet I wont lose 20 pounds by the wedding?
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
She cried the whole movie and got kicked out for saying "[Santa's beard] looks so soft I wanna stick my dick in it." We're going again next week. Drunk animation majors are the best
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It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
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