is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
"The juvenile turned and faced the officer, unzipped his pants, placed a fresh cigarette in between his legs and preceded to light it with a match"
My horoscope told me I'm getting laid tonight. Please don't make the stars be liars
Pizza delivery...for when you need to eat your feelings for the sex you aren't having
You're dating a nurse! That's smart, you never know when you'll have a medical emergency. Probably liver failure.
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
But you can't tell me I give the best blow jobs and then not break up with your girlfriend who has fucking TMJ! Come on!
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
Afterwards I drank a whole bottle of cake vodka in the bathtub while he was bawling his eyes out. Hands down weirdest hookup I've ever had.
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
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