u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
she just built a cabin out of hotdogs and cooked it in the microwave.
now she is shaking the plate and mumbling "this is what california must feel like"
I think I used your jacking off shit when I showered. I couldn't see shit, it was all oily. Fuck power outages
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
Is percocet and coffee considered a balanced breakfast?
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
So then I got so stoned I sat and took my pulse for 10 minutes.
The last thing I remember saying was "Tequila for all!!"
If you count the sounds from the room down the hall....that was definitely NOT the last thing that came out of your mouth.
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