how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
was just hit on by a homeless lesbian. forever alone.
Of course the first guy who sees my nipple piercings is a Catholic from Nebraska who won't do anything but dry hump me.
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
I am a good friend because I got you a bagel. I am a bad friend because I ate half of it.
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
I just hope the day something happens to me my phone just dies, like literally died and will never turn on ever again. I feel like God owes me that much.
you kept saying how you wanted to mainline bacardi right into your bloodstream. medical school is doing wonderful things to your brain
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
Who knew sons of strippers would be really feminist boyfriends?
I mean metaphorically. Literally zombies have yet to invade. Let's be rational here.
Going through his web history. 10 hours ago he searched "how to put on condom with your teeth" I think I'm getting it tonight.
Randomize
