Why does Corona taste like a burp?
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
There's a mirror laying face down next to me. A looooong full body mirror. By the looks of it it fell off the wall last night and was within centimeters of shattering on my head. Awesome.
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
Drinking Hot Toddies on the Porch and blasting bob dylans "hurricane" bring it on sandy!
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
You're the common denominator of my blackouts.
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
Banged a girl last night wearing nothing but my Team USA Olympic jersey. I think it's safe to say that nut was for America.
no offense but you looked like shit yesterday
tequila is unforgiving..
Randomize
