just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
you are my new fav person for making him do the walk of shame in pink footie pajamas!
Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
They tried. Someone started to yell beer shower but he spun around and punched them in the mouth before they even finished saying beer. He's a fast little drunk.
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
She's wearing her dead grandmother's pearl on the married finger so no guys "bother her" tonight... I am not THAT committed to Girl's Night.
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
Fate is real! that hot chick, Megan just showed up dressed as jasmine and I'm dressed as Aladdin this is going to be cake
Defrosting my uncrustable with my laptop...Hungover dinner
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
Also, McDonald's breakfast is now 24/7. This is it. This is how I die. Face first in a pile of hashbrowns.
This time tomorrow I will be drunk and in a voodoo shop
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
Randomize
