please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
just realized I'm too high to take the plastic off a slice of cheese....
I just got three quarters of the way there before I realized I was way too stoned for class so I bought a smoothie and walked home.
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
Dude, she brought over peach cobbler, weed and alcohol plus I'm gonna get laid. She's by far the coolest sister you have.
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
Well that's the second time I've broken a lamp during sex this month. Starting to worry I'm some kind of X-man. (this one was a wall sconce and I fully smashed it with my head and it crumbled like it was made of sugar)
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
the only joy I get out of her anymore is hitting on her friends and ignoring her. it's chaos for them. like shaking a slutty ant farm
I'm eating animal crackers on my bed next to my vibrator writing about the hopelessness and depravity of humanity. I am LIVING.
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
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