Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
4 maple syrup blunts. Decided to sit on my roof and count the snowflakes that landed on my tongue. 84.
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
So like 5 seconds in I realize I knew him in 3rd grade and I went limp in his mouth. It felt like I just murdered the last unicorn ever. Going straight never felt like an option till now.
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
I'm laying here half naked telling him I'm eating gold fish to change the subject of hookin up cuz I don't wanna put pants on
Just got your message from Saturday. Shove all the kittens down your pants? Really?
I was emotionally compromised.
Strip clubs just aren't as fun when a man tries to drunkenly grind on you.
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
As a friend tho, you have the biggest dick I've ever seen
My boobs look fucktastic, I have a booty call on Sunday and a dick photo on my phone. Life is grand!
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