I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
why im i the only drunk person in the library?
we were dressed as cave people and he kept telling everybody i was so easy a caveman could do it.
hot ketchup is not a substitute for marinara
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
I wish pancakes were everywhere. Just pancakes. I want lilies at my wedding. No dress. Just priest. Just lilies.
Don't ask how or why, but I think the 775 on the inside of my lip is permanent
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
Yes. I will keep putting the beer into my stomach and eventually the bartender will make a mistake
Let's be honest I'm gonna watch murder she wrote and eat taquitos at three am
In Punta Cana for my bachelor trip, hopefully tomorrow my passport is blacklisted
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize
