We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
The only thing I have to prove last night happened is a fireman's hat full of puke.
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
when she asked where we met, i said the liquor store. the next words out of moms mouth? 'oh that's real promising molly'
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
No it's okay, we're just driving to random places with the portable stripper pole and causing a ruckus.
Oh that's normal
My office already closed tomorrow. I'm bout to get drunk and build a muh fuckin fort. I shall call it "Fort Fuck You, Sandy, You Fuckin Bitch"
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
he kept insisting he didn't have my number, so i called his phone and my number came up as "yeaaaaaaaaah!"
I spent three hours in the ER last night to figure out that my friend just had to take a shit
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
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