he just sent me a friend request on facebook. i wish it were physically possible to vomit on him through the internet.
do you think i can make that microwavable cake stuff with vodka instead of water?
you should probably use water
i dont have any
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
Its a first. Never been peed on in a line to concert. First time for everything.
She kept telling me it was a squirtgun.
She's barefoot and topless screaming "HERE KITTY-KITTY" at a stray cat in the ditch on the side of the highway. How do I get her back in the car?
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
She's relieving herself in the laundry room. I'm really hoping there's a toilet in there...
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
Is it weird to befriend your older alcoholic landlords?
Bottom line; if I'm coming out of my bat cave to do the dishes and get a chicken wing and I have no pants or makeup on and my messy bun looks more like Santa got leprosy and crashed his sled into the back of my head then let me be. That's all I'm saying.
The highlight of my night will be digging in other people's garbage
Yeahh. im on the phone with him drunk. he told me he found a pigeon in a cardboard box and named it quincy...
Randomize
