Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
I think I can smell my own vagina right now
You're the 8th person from last night to text me this morning and ask if I'm ok.
you were saying "i am the vodka queen!" and then in a different voice replying to yourself "all hail the vodka queen! you are so beautiful!"
Random girl at this party just gave me a lap dance in a la-Z-boy. Night significantly improved.
If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
He doesn't belong with God. He belongs face-down in a pile of his own excrement, vomit, blood and semen. Then pissed on by Satan.
My dad used the quotation mark gesture with his hands when he asked how my "roommate" was doing.
That may be because I drunkenly sent him a pick of you two curled up together like kittens. Two very buff kittens.
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
Also if i get drunk and start crying about the elephants you all have my permission to abandon me.
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
Randomize
