Whod you bang
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
Ya, because touching his brother's face for 20 minutes in front of him wasn't bad enough, I also threw up in his garden and stole like 10 of his shirts before I left. But I fed his dog, so it's okay.
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
you were like "guys ... i think i got fingered while dancing tonight"
our poor poor cab driver
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
You know what would make this walk of shame even better? Picking up my cap n gown on the way to my car
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
You gave your one night stand my number. I told him you left for your sex change an hour ago.
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
Learn from my mistakes, you naive soul: Gay love triangles are just as dangerous as straight love triangles.
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
He told you he loved you. Then you wanted to find a chainsaw to cut his dick off.
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