Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
just took my temp. 103. i wonder how tylenol and jager bombs are gonna mix
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
You have all of her herpes and none of my sympathy
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
So do you know how we found out he was engaged?
An Amber Alert?
With gravity the way it is and your butt clearly being the size of a bus you'd break your hip or something
I'm a dude in a dress, who came to a party with Holly GoLightly, got hit on by Bambi's mom, and wants to do terrible things to Link. Halloween is weird
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
Can you masturbate to someone liking your instagram picture?
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
Randomize
