Last-second stop at the drug store for lube and condoms. Clerk said "So uhmmm...that's a done deal, huh?"
High five!
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
Pretty sure I just had sex with the black kid who grew up in a car from "angels in the outfield"
How come I never meet celebrities?
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
I feel like I have African malaria. I just remembered singing Teenage Dream in full to that biker couple at the bar.
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
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Last night was just one giant freudian slip.
You made out with EVERYBODY.
Can I just bleach my life?
I just sang country roads at the top of my lungs with my cab driver. Tonight was a success.
Went to night shots with Kayla... she punched this guy and I got his friends number. Not sure if she's the best or worst wingman ever.
Hi I haven't talked to you since you bought legal marijuana-are you still stoned?
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
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