Next weekend I am getting a library card and staying my whore ass home.
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
It just hit me that I woke up to you in a bear suit. Explain.
i just saw the eighteen different ways i could die and only after that did i realize i'd made a poor decision
He's like my sex unicorn. Elusive and majestic. I'll catch him, I'm baiting with patron.
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
Let's go one conversation without mentioning cats or alcohol someday.
Worse: texted mom-in-law by mistake that I sharted.
Worser: she offered to clean me up
Just cried to my husband about how much I'm going to miss my boyfriend... Maybe marriage is going to work for me after all
The high school classes are online, not my sex life. He still comes over for “teacher / parent conferences.” A couple more “conferences” and I’ll be able to rewrite the Sex Ed curriculum
Randomize