What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
it was so cute when you were pretending to have willpower
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
Life lesson: using the oven as a heater= $500 electric bill
sitting next to michael phelps in the airport. wonder if he's carrying...
We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
I hated hipsters before it was mainstream.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
Oh please tell me that I'm sleeping in your shower and not the neighbor's again
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
How many people slept in the bouncy castle last night?
4 guys, 1 girl. Pretty sure were gonna have to pay the cleaning fee
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
Between fucking and sleeping I woke up missing four out of five of the earrings I was wearing. It's like a star rating system. I had to give him props.
I'm wearing a fleece onesie eating pop tarts on the train to work. Killing it.
Randomize
