I faked an abortion last night.
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
You and I should start a club for people who woke up on outside on a bench with no idea how they got there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
Currently standing on top of my parents leather couch with no pants on playing helicoptor with my penis. You?
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
she said she'd blow me if I bought one of her sorority raffle tickets. Goddamn it's gettin easy
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
Throwing up while listening to NPR because I’m trying to adult through this hangover
Just got your voicemail. The 3am call wasn't a drunk dial, it was an I left my phone in my pocket then has wild animalistic sex dial...
I hate you.
You LOVE me.
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
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