The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
Youre attempt to ruin my night by putting Date Rape by Sublime on my sex playlist failed. She was into it.
Drinking ketchup directly out of the bottle does not make it tomato juice.
They had their heads out of the car singing the wrong words to the national anthem as we drove through traffic of people leaving the fireworks. AMURICA
Let me refresh your memory. New Year's Eve in the back of my car you grabbed my hand and said feel my tumor on my butthole and at that moment I swear we were infinite
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
Best part about a crippling state-wide drought? Actually having a valid excuse for not showering
I'm daydrinking whiskey in a princess hat
I lost my voice. So I'm going to pretend I'm Ariel with legs today.
He's eating a sriracha ravioli sandwich. How do you think the night is going?
Randomize
