Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
Remember when I use to call my dick 'the pendulum'
wtf?
It is now the artist formerly known as 'insideyourgirlfriend'
Walk of Shame. In a state park.
Mother fucker. I'm a 30J now. I'm fucking speechless
this stripper weighs a pound. I feel like I should tip her in food.
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
there was a goddamn geisha at house. my dick feels more cultured.
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
Everytime I come home this stoned I masturbate in the shower for that long, its like my lonely ritual. Accept me.
I got pulled over by the same cop in a 4.5 hour window. Got off both times. Fuck yes.
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
Randomize
