you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
we hooked up on one of my student's desks last night...i can't decide if i'm ashamed or massively proud of myself
dude you teach first grade wtf
My shirt is ruined. If I ever get the idea of doing a tequila shot through my nose ever again, shoot me.
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
The fool I made of myself at the Ugly Christmas Sweater party last night was surpassed this morning when I walk of shamed 6 miles at 7am with one mysterious wet leg and no pants on. I think my mom saw me and waved.
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
He told me he was married and then fingered me on the kitchen counter. It was awkward to explaining the broken toaster to my roommates this morning...
I'm in public and Taylor Swift is playing. It is taking all my effort to not screech like a goat.
He took a picture of me to show his boss why he was late...Is that a compliment or not?
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
i had a flashback to you roaring like a dying tiger and then throwing your wallet (maybe?) at the cat in the living room and saying "you're the only adult that lives here take all my money"
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
he's a mother fucking interior design major!! we boned and fell asleep and now we're laying in bed discussing what color i should paint my room. i'm marrying him
I asked him if we could have sex sometime and he sent me a three page long text about his feelings for me. that's the only possible situation I've ever run into where a "k" response would have been more appropriate.
Randomize