Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
he shattered multiple jars of jelly against his roommates doors last night. this morning the asian one wouldn't even talk to him because he thought he was gonna get beaten up
I realized we pick a president more often than I get a blowjob
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
Oh you know, sitting here in my bathing suit watching antiques road show and petting the cat. Just the usual
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
I called him a "Beautiful Bastard" with "Beautiful Bastard Hair". That is how you pick up a guy from Denmark.
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
Randomize