So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
I'm smoking weed out of a trumpet
I just did a slip and slide down the hall way of my apartment building
Tie
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
Every time I hang out with your gay friend, I have to make a checklist of words to look up when I get home. First Google of the night? "Power bottom."
if i hurry i can finally have sex while stoned off my ass
godspeed.
Sorry you had to hear me puke. I didn't know I called you. Was it graceful?
I made two strippers play rock paper scissors to see who would give me a lap dance last night
So many lesbians keep hitting on me. I'm about to give up and just go home with the manliest one.
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
I ate a pepperoni off of someone's floor last night. We need to talk.
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
i need some magic done to my vagina
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