No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
You know what, matt, a girl is not really that interested in a relationship if she goes down on you the first time she meets you
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
You were talking about masturbating on the phone then said you had to go because golden girls was on then you called me back saying you seen that episode already.
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
I woke up this morning and the search history on my phone says: "What is this castle in front of my house?"
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just had an acid flashback in my therapist's office. i am a walking stereotype
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
I probably should have told her I was actually the drunkest one there before she let me pierce her ear
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
Randomize