I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
Ive given up on my natural charms. Im trying different accents till some girl wants to hook up with me.
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
Dance move was taxi-ing on the runway then taking off in a plane. All the boys wanted to beat you up cause they were like "who is this angel flapping her arms like a bird in the bar i must have her"
he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress
In your drunken glory you promised me, tongue, 12 naked pics, and 1,800 breakfasts.
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
I told my therapist about the other night and he actually whistled and said "wow that is not good."
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
How was your night?
Fell down a flight of stairs. Went to a sex dungeon. Was approached by a man in a leather harness.
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
Randomize
