After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
i just ordered an al pacino with double mocha at starbucks.. i'm waiting to see how long it takes the chick to realize what i said.
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
Its midnight, he's burning water on the stove and keeps yelling at me and telling me not to burn myself.
You drink it until you puke in a vent one time and it's ruined forever.
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
You told me I couldn't make out with you until I added you on LinkedIn
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
I haven't reeked of cheap beer and poor decisions in months. I officially hate adult life.
I wanna get high and watch Shrek tonight...don't make me do it alone.
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
Your life is a soap opera of great sex, cats, and booze.
I'm a freaking penguin. one mate for life, and really awkward at parties
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