Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just won "most creative" category in the condom contest in human sexuality by licking it onto a cucumber. my feedback forms included three phone numbers, one with a Magnum XL taped to it
There is a pube in my fucking eyeball
there's a picture of you and pauly shore at a starbucks on my phone
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I accidentally told my mom "the reason I didn't answer your call is because my phone was in my pants, on the floor"
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
You should not have followed "the guy who peed in my bed" with "he smells good."
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
Boredom is so much more tolerable when you're stoned off your ass.
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