she really just asked how mermaids reproduce.
Its a long story, but I have superglue on my tongue
Why is there an empty beer bottle in the shower?
Why wouldn't there be.
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
How can you turn a kayak date down? I'M TALKING RIVER HEAD HERE.
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
sick fucks of a feather flock together
I have a new philosophy. Fuck wearing bras, it's summertime.
When i sexted him a pic of my boobs I was worried he was going to notice the dorito crumbs and know I was just eating topless
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
At some point, I’d like to pretend that his penis is a popsicle.
i think i just lost a toe
Hey. You dropped and smashed your road beer in my store last night. Again. And this time you didn't even order anything. You just walked in, yelled "SWEDISH STYLE!" Then lost your beer, looked depressed, and left.
Randomize
