I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
Currently standing on top of my parents leather couch with no pants on playing helicoptor with my penis. You?
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
You passed out in my bathroom last night. I put a towel over your face so I could shit without it being gay
He barely got in the door before she began to shriek like a banshee and punch him. His rainbow wig is still hanging from the front porch as a "warning to all other clowns".
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
cops woke me up on the sidewalk and asked where my shoes are.. fuck if i know, im sleeping on the sidewalk! actually i didnt say that, i just cried until they gave me a ride home.
His last Google search was "will sperm ruin the retina display on Apple products?"
So i just remembered that thing i use to do with your butt because of shark week.
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
Randomize
