He's coming over tonight...I really wish I didn't have my period right now...
I believe I'm witnessing the first time ever that you wished your period would NOT come....
I need to stop fucking people before I get to know them
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
I can't wait to get home and brush the fuck outta my teeth.
Literally.
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
Like I could say no to two hot people already naked and fucking. Please. I'm not made of stone.
Twice?!
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
A girl just managed to steal a whole gallon of ice cream. I'm letting her go because that is impressive.
I love waking up to reeses ice cream. But I DONT love waking up to it all over my cat. I blame you.
No I will not paint you for Mardi Gras in town. It is going to rain and you don't need another ID charge
Randomize
