also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
Planned Parenthood should have gift certificates.
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
I have no idea what happened last night, but you're the only person I remember smashing my face into. Be honored.
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
Emily is drunk. We're coming to see you at work and we're bringing jello shots for you.
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
aha we'll just say that my mind was so focused on A Bugs Life that it was hard to maintain an erection
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
I think the universe has a conglomeration of sentences reserved only for me.
The number of threesomes I have agreed to seems to increase every time I talk to you drunk...
I just hooked up with the German exchange student who doesn't speak English. And you said I have no talent.
Randomize
