did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
Drinking at work by myself... My boss just walked into me copying my face on the copy machine..
I just test ran being their maid. I'm getting 50 bucks a month and they're buying the costume.
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
I picked up the bartender so he could open the bar early and ended up with him giving me a ride home when he closed. I like snowdays and everything, but they get really expensive. Also, I think I threw up on his front door. Not checking.
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
Yes, if by 'finishing my business' you mean vomiting in her bathtub and losing my watch.
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
So i had a lucid dream about blowing myself. This is why people love me
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
I haven't had sex since the Vanilla Ice concert
Please don't have sex ever again just so you can say that forever.
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
Randomize
