Dude, I just woke up on the floor of some random chick's floor with puke in my hair and a posted note on my forehead that said "It's over." Dude I wasn't even aware I was in a relationship...
Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
Thursdays are my worst days
but now we sippin champagne when we thirstay?
make sure i look cute passed out on the couch.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
Seriously you've eaten pizza pockets for every meal for the past 4 days
Well to be fair I wasn't alive for breakfast 2 out of 4 days
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
'go have sex with her' ddoes not count as wingman
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
Randomize