So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
that shit musta been laced I laughed for two hours and everyone looked like penguins
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
Drunk me thought he was hot enough to overlook the fact that he had poison ivy and still have sex with him. Sober me wants to know if you have any calamine lotion.
I just need to repress my desire to share my impressive chugging abilities with the world and I won't black out so much
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
If I have to give a UPS guy a lap dance, you owe me a drink.
Well for decently drunk, in the woods, last-person-i-should-be-hooking-up-with sex, i thought it was pretty good.
Sorry, I gave half my brain to my thesis and the other half to mdma
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
Randomize
