Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :(
Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
i just heard one Asian kid say to another, "i bet if i could get into Harvard i could get laid all the time, my brother lost his virginity the first night there."
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
Hey cutie is the game almost over? I'm making dinner for us it'll be ready soon. Xox
You would rather make fucking dinner than watch a hockey game that rivals the epic-ness of miracle, the one of the biggest upsets in sport history? Babe I don't know if I can date a girl with such terrible priorities.
Just when you think you're never going to have sex again, BOOM you're naked in bed with a guatemalan
Through drunken recall, I have managed to bring back awful memories of losing my virginity. And possibly traumatized my niece trying to get her to "learn from my mistakes".
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
I told you you to bring something to share....you brought tequila and a condom
I told him I was going to sit on his face after I got out of the shower, he threw up the arm boners and yelled "STEVE HOLT!!" I might actually stop sleeping with other dudes.
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
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