i want to open my blinds to let the sunlight in my room, but i'm afraid my neighbors will be able to see me drinking and judge me
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
I just used 'come play with my balls' as a legitimate booty call attempt. And it worked.
You fuck like a mechanic. That is the universe telling you that is your true calling. Take this as a sign.
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
I was just at home taking Vicodin for a week straight. Talk about a vacation.
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
When I go out tonight I need to make sure to be really good. The Easter bunny doesn't deliver to jail
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
He said did you just interrupt me midsentence to admire another man's penis?
I just twinged a muscle in my shoulder trying to hug myself. In the world of loneliness-based injuries, this is a new low for me.
My bed smells like the plague
Ok, there are marshmallows shaped like elephants
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