I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
i saw a guy balancing a black cat on his head last nite
get a pic
i tried he was too far away anotherguy was walking with paper bags on his feet explain that
i want ur life
Holy jesus god. My teeth taste like street.
She turned over and said "You smell like my dad, i just can't do this"
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
I woke up in my own bed clutching a key to a Ramada in another state.
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
I had sex on a dinosaur comforter, tell me that does not define my life.
You kept trying to make cocktails with my protein powder last night...
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
There is a wine bar at this airport that it is currently full of mid-40s women reading their Kindles. I'm attracted to all of them.
It's 11 A.M.
You know what, I think I will
Intoxication Level: I'm as graceful and flawless as a fucking dinosaur.
Randomize
