i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
The nurse told me they're using the same medicine that killed michael jackson.
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge
College is the ONLY place where you can pass off morning sickness as being hungover. I'm currently pouring beer in a spray bottle so I can spray it on myself and smell drunk.
Totally sleeping on a bloodstained mattress tonight. I love life's little adventures.
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
I was like wtf you can warn a girl like hey I have a huge dick and I fuck for hours
Someone google feeding your vagina Advil and Neosporin
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You don't know reunion panic until you've exfoliated your butt cheeks.
I'm gonna play eenie meenie at the bar tonight because it's women's day and I deserve the dick
Yeah, so, that moment when the repair guy comes in and you see your cock ring on the counter one second before he does.
you should probably call the Bronx Zoo in the morning to formally apologize
its the right thing to do
Dude, no, you tried to sleep on the stove. I mean. You were pissed when I stopped you... but I couldn't have you catching on fire in my house.
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
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