is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
She tried to ditch the cab before she payed but she forgot to grab her shoes and wake me up
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
She gave me a handjob at the dinner table while her dad was carving the turkey. I made eye contact with him. Im pretty sure he knew.
You then proceeded to tell me how good of a cook you were and put raw cookie dough in the champagne.
Hypothetically going to the gym on coke was a good idea
I just heard a 350 lb guy with a stutter describe getting blood in his eye as he was shanking his cellmate and, more generally, how to survive as a white guy in jail.\n\nYou should really consider going to some AA meetings
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
i feel sensations at the ends of my beard. Either I am super high. Or my face has accepted my beard and I completed my transformation to Mecca
So you broke your ribs while fucking? Dude you just got about 25% hotter.
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
My first hangover at work. I'm officially an adult.
Randomize
