I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
the non-midget kid sent 8,000 texts in a month. the midget parents are pissed. THIS IS EPIC WHEN YOUR HIGH.
Her best friend sent her a random hate text and the song they played at her father's funeral came on the radio. I just got cock blocked by the universe
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
I'm pretty happy on the couch eating Popeyes and watching Cops so if I go over there you better have drugs left
Your first mistake was thinking that you could get through the day without drinking a single bottle of alcohol. Your second mistake was wearing shark boxers.
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
Is it bad I have to get shitty ass drunk on a Monday night because I can't adult?
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
My new plan is to whip out my titties when they arrive. Maybe they won’t notice that I broke the couch fucking my boss...
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
Had to trim my nails cus they got too long to effectively finger myself with
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