IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
tell me how i ended up in the movie theater alone with a bottle of smirnoff and a bendy straw.
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
she called for a booty call so i sent mike as my stunt double
If I ever write a book, i'm calling it "why do i work with fucktards?"
It'll be a good sequel to my other book, "why do i sleep with fucktards?"
If you call getting home safe by sprinting down Spanish Harlem barefoot still rolling then ya I made it
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
I told him that we shouldn't complicate things. He responded with a dick pic.
Because I chose to live vicariously through your uterus and you're letting me down right now.
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
i stood outside in the bushes for thirty minutes. Do you know how many drunk guys pee in bushes at 2 am?
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
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