My face smells like last night's lay. I need a whore bath. Or a corndog.
i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
There's a black statue of liberty dancing on the side of the road. Please hold while I join him.
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
I think sneezing out coked up boogers onto your professor disqualifies you from the "I was sick" excuse
This isn't just a hangover. I can feel the blood moving through my veins, and it hurts.
I can't turn off my feet"
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
it was also funny because at one point I woke up with my hands tied with a belt and we were both like what the fuck
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
Randomize
