Denial is the first step to alcoholism…and I don't hate it
He uses pillows to masturbate.
He told me to pretend to be a shark, and he would slay me with his harpoon cock.
Can you call him, he said something about going to the balcony to pee and now hes texting me saying hes lost
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.
No more fucking baseball tools. Walk-of-shamed home in only a pinstriped jersey and a Red Sox SnapBack.
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just gave him road head. He came in the Taco Bell drive thru which seems pretty typical for my life.
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
I DONT HAVE A FUCKING JOB RIGHT NOW. DO YOU THINK I HAVE TIME TO WASTE GOING BACK AND FORTH WITH SOMEONE WHOS LYING, ABOUT LYING, AND JUST BEING A LIAR? HONESTLY, YES I DO HAVE TIME. BUT I HAVE A FUCKING LOT BETTER THINGS I COULD BE WASTING MY TIME DOING. LIKE ORGANIZING MY POKEMON CARD COLLECTION.
Why did my mother make you get naked?
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
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