He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
My new years resolution is to be alive new years morning
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
I no longer question where these bruises come from... between the strip pole in the living room, the slipnslide in the hallway and our constant level of intoxication I will always be bruised...
This is absurd. I need a man. Or even a moderately-clean hobo will do at this point.
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
Self care is breaking into nasa and launching yourself directly into the fucking void
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
Randomize
