Shiiiit I think I'm getting sick. probably had something to do with the fact that i shared my mouth with everyone last night.
Wait. That came out far sluttier than I intended.
i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
they could make at least 3 episode of "i shouldn't be alive" out of my weekend
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
Have you ever chased with pilaf before? Because dont.
I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
I found you laying in the kitchen with a bottle of vodka and a slice of bologna on your face. You said you were having a spa day.
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
Apparently I walked to Denny's in the pouring rain without shoes just socks last night. Excellent.
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
Is it bad that I'm a 32 year old woman that is so afraid of commitment that a hamster is too much responsibility?
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
Its official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world
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