Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
I just found glitter on my vibrator... whatever we're doing has to stop
Dude you picked up her Chihuahua and threatened to kill it yelling "it's not cinco de mayo, bitches"
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
she made a facebook for her toddler.. his likes include lil wayne and ice luge. He has more friends than i do. I mean, Seriously? there's not enough booze in the world to make thanksgiveing bearable
Totally forgot I asked the cop for a theoretical fist bump and he still let me drive away
mom is telling me the setting in which I was conceived
did you know we used to have a pool?
I tried getting kicked out of my favorite bar. No matter what I did, I could do no wrong
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
Buying drug test kits off amazon. And qualifying for amazonSmile donation to a kids hospital feels wrong and funny at the same time xD
The guy I hooked up with two weeks ago just friended me on Venmo, I honestly won't be mad if he pays me for the sex
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
Randomize
