i wish my apartment had room service that i didn't have to pay for.
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
can we change the rule from "no one is ugly after 2 am" to 1130 so i can justify last night
i'm sitting pantsless eating potato chips and watching porn before he picks me up for our date. I hope he's ready for this...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I realized I was officially over him when I was getting a lap dance on the keg bus at 3am from his old boss and I was double fisting:)
I bought 2 40s with winning lottery tickets and they paid me $.03. 'Merica
My bed is full of blood and feathers
Some girl at my gym just tried to casually drop the fact she can kegel 3 lbs...
And everyone was looking at me because it was cold and I was drunk and may have screamed "oh fuck" ... You know what, fuck that. What do people think they're getting at Denny's 2 in the morning
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
Woke up with an e-cig stuck in my asshole. Explain.
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
Remember the random guy who licked my face when we were at the bar the other night?
Yeah. His name is Andrew. We just met
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
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